A little story about Oprahdom, confidence
About a year ago to this very week I was approached by a TV production company about a presenting role. It came out of the blue through someone I had not spoken with for nearly 15 years. Over 6 weeks there were lots of calls back and forth, half a day being filmed, meeting producers, making it to a final shortlist of 2. I felt jangled throughout.
Applying a mantra borrowed from Brene Brown : “don’t shrink, don’t puff-up, stand in your truth” helped but I noticeably pinged between shrinking and puffing-up (luckily mostly in my own head so no relationship casualties)
My ego wanted so badly to take the first steps into Oprahdom but my heart, soul and mind screamed “Be Real, Get Support, Stand in your Truth.”
Confidence is the courage to ask for the support and wisdom is knowing who to ask. So, I shared my thoughts, confusion, fears and excitement with a small group of people I trust. The more I heard myself as I spoke to them and listened to what they said the more I realized that my fear and caution was not a lack of confidence in my abilities as a presenter: my gut said there was a chance the role may have led to me sabotaging rather than boosting my confidence to be really, truly, utterly myself. Additionally I suspected I might actually become part of something that might hurt or harm others under the banner ‘entertainment’.
So…. I said NO!.
Although I was being true to my self my ego hurt so much I literally put myself to bed for 26 hours.
A year later, I feel more powerfully confident in trusting myself around others – because of this experience. I have lived experience of real confidence as making decisions that maintain my ease in my own skin as I connect to you, to myself and to the world.